Today is kids day.  All the kids in Thailand are puffed-up-proud of themselves on this; their own shiny day.

Mail, Pha Ngan and Mai come around, a raggle taggle procession of differently sized stompy feet. Proud in their proper baseball shoes, rather than customary dirty barefoot. Raucous on this the day no grown up can tell them no.

They each clutch a prize from the festivities in the main town, Pha ngan a cheap wind up car, Mai a ruler and pencil and Mail an already grubby doll.  That they feel special, important and feted is written loud on their faces and warms my heart to see.

Pha Ngan, this troubled boy, on the brink of almost certainly delinquent teenage years, who runs and steals, is chased and beaten and neglected in equal measure. Who has the most infinite tenderness and sweetness with Clear Sky that is truly beautiful to behold.  I know his path is set for trouble, his lack of love and care has written it so, and the trouble path is oh-so-dangerous for boys in this oh-so-wild of places.

I pray that somewhere in himself he has courage and drags up his strength in the face of adversity and clings onto his sweetness through it all, to find the love of a kind woman, and the comfort of a loving family.

Mai my little intrepid boy-man, the cutie pie who will melt a million hearts, whom tourists want to grab and hug at every opportunity, who loves baked beans. Who is a sensitive soul and cries easily in the face of other boys’ cruelty as he learns in his five-year-old world what it takes to be a man.

And E mail, my beautiful bouncing butterball baby girl.  A little sunbeam, who makes us roar with laughter and brings brightness to even the shabbiness of happenings.  Whose valiant heart is always happy, despite the persistent sickness that plagues her, the chronic asthma and the ongoing hospitalizations.  With her grubby little legs, permanently dripping nose, and wild unkempt hair she powers through life with enthusiasm that knows no bounds.

Nong mail, kids day

Undaunted she throws herself at everyone she meets with the same open heart, asking only love in return.  When I first met her she was a tiny, fat little thing, rolls of chubbiness, perfect cherub mouth and wide wondering eyes.  Unfortunately she was also scared of farang and would scream her head off if I even looked at her.

The first time she let me take her out to the beach I fell in love, and knew that we would have a special relationship this little ball of merriment and I.  When she took her first steps it was into my hands, and I thought I would burst with excitement and pride as she tottered towards me, arms aloft, trusting entirely.  What big responsibility to witness her evolution from that squidgy powdered baby ball to this fabulous gorgeous girl who stands before me, or rather runs, jumps, kicks, and dances, before me.

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What a glorious day today was. I awoke to the smell of warm air and the glow of sunlight for the first time in days.

What a difference the sun makes! I have been valiantly washing everything we own since we got back due to above mentioned smells, today for the first time things felt clean and crispy dry – the smell of clean laundry and sun-baked linen was everywhere around me, and what a welcome relief.

We spent the day as usual, madly trying to catch up on all the damage and refurbishment after the monsoon. But despite all the cement piled around, the buzz of saws, wood dust and hard slog, today the world is a beautiful place to be.

She is literally bopping her little socks off along with the highly dubious tune – and all this without the aid of a TV. Priceless. At the end of the day we have very little money, every week is a struggle to keep our heads above water in the most basic of ways, but we are raising our daughter in beauty and nature and with the love and adoration of both her fully present parents and the help, care and support of an entire village. When it is tough, and other aspects make me weep with exhaustion or worry, I can hold on to this strength.

Nong mail also arrived back from her holidays today, and what a sight for sore eyes is this little angel. No longer a baby, she is fast becoming a wondrous girl-child, quieter, a little more cautious perhaps than in her boisterous, romping babyhood, but with the same gorgeous humour and character present in her eyes.

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